As some of you may know, I took a journey to Bali in December 2014 and I haven’t talked much about it yet, as I didn’t feel the time was right. It was most definitely a transformational experience, and I think for the past 3 months I have still been integrating the trip.
I went to Bali with Transformational Coach Kute Blackson. He created a journey which took 16 visionaries to Bali for a 12 day Uncoaching or Unlearning experience.
I have followed Kute’s blogs for several years now and was completely drawn to his teachings, his words and his authentic energy. I also knew of his various programs however wasn’t fully drawn too them. However, one day in July, it hit me like a ton of bricks after a dinner conversation with a friend.
I have to go to Bali.
I was trying to figure out what these words meant, I researched surf and yoga retreats, and other tours, and then I recalled, Kute hosts a journey to Bali. I signed up for more information that day, the next day I received an email for an interview, the next day I had an interview, the day after that my case was reviewed and I was accepted (not all are accepted), and next thing I knew I was signed up and Bali bound December 2014.
I signed up for the journey purely on intuition; I did not know much about the trip itself, nor the people who attend!
The trip was way out of my comfort zone.
Kute asks us not to speak of specifics of locations and exercises during the trip, in order to not ruin the trip for future attendees. This is something everyone honours as the power of the unknown, of the trip, was half of the reason for the transformations. We would never want to ruin or take that away from anyone seeking healing during future Bali trips with Kute.
What did occur is several guidelines were implemented. We weren’t permitted to look at time; meal times were never set; disconnect from all phones and wifi; sleep times, i would guess, to be an average of 4-5 hours per night; we did not know the itinerary of the day and many other guidelines.
What was the purpose of this? It followed the theme of the entire trip, to demonstrate day after day, that generally we will limit ourselves with our mind. If one looks at the clock at 2am and has to wake at 7am, we will think, “I”m going to be so tired in the morning.” However, when you have no idea of time- fatigue is also questionable. There is no mind ability to calculate the time and think, yep, 5 hours, I will be tired. We didn’t know. And we had full full days, and I can easily say I was not tired during the entire trip. We also ate at an average of 9am, and sometimes “lunch” I would guess at about 9pm. Did hunger consume our thoughts? No. We had snacks with us, however, without seeing time, our “mind” didn’t know if we should be overly hungry or perfectly timed hungry…the “should bes” of the mind were all stopped, with the simple trick of eliminating time and social media. This sets the stage for the deeper meaning of the trip. What each of us went to heal.
I learned ways I live, ways I interact with people, ways I seek approval, ways I seek safety, ways I seek survival.
We learned that all of us are conditioned from an early age to figure out how to survive, and how to be loved. Early on we learned to adopt masks we wear to get love. For example, if I’m nice, I’ll be loved; if I put others first, they will like me; if i have anger I am bad, etc etc. All of these masks are learned in childhood. Yet they are not the true us.
I have been very open about my health issues and my journey to heal. It has been a relentless pursuit for health and wellness since I was 16 years old.
I do believe at the root- root of health imbalances- are stuck emotions.
In addition to Naturopathic pursuits, subconscious and emotional work was also a big part of my healing since 2008. However, in Bali, I think I got to the root.
The masks I wore, the conditioning I received, at the root of all this was a huge belief. The belief that was at the root of many of my health issues, was:
- my asthma was linked to feeling suffocated with what OTHERS thought I should do, how I should act, how I should be.
This was set at a young age. And:
- the subconscious belief which let me to hold myself very controlled and contracted because if I let go, I would die.
This came from me always being in the ER as a toddler for life-threatening asthma attacks. My whole family was programmed, “to make sure I don’t die”. I subconsciously conducted my whole life to try not to die of asthma.
Huge realization I didn’t even know I carried. The emotions simply needed to be expressed and cleared, which they were.
Since the trip I have experienced massive changes in my life. Life flows with more ease, with relaxation, with energy, and I am still learning to sloowww down, yet be 10x more productive.
It truly was a trip of a life time.
Kute speaks often of growth occurring as we stretch outside our comfort zone. This is something that I would encourage everyone to do. We can all ‘stretch’ any time any place. Examples could include, taking out all sugar from your diet; or stopping all alcohol; or waking at 6am five days a week to work out; or learning to say NO; or cancelling your cable or commit to castor oil packs 5 days a week. The possibilities are endless! And whatever you are called to do, is likely going to provide you the greatest healing. Kute teaches that it is easy to love and be loving to one another in our comfort zone. But can you love when you are stretched, when you are uncomfortable, when you are having an emotional crisis. Can you still be loving to people around you? It is easy when we are comfy 🙂
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A take home from this blog would be to choose something that would cause you to “stretch”, and incorporate it, and don’t give up on committing to yourself.
What do you choose?
Send us a message, let us know! And take note of what changes in your life. Everyone looks for success to be one significant event, however, the reality is, it is a series of small steps taken consistently. Success is in the small steps!
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